Paranormal Activity: Bouncing Back After Getting Ghosted

Getting ghosted sucks, but this is the first time in my life that I’ve been double ghosted. However, these two ghosting instances are not created equal. One is a subject I’ve covered before, and no, this is not an article about a woman scorned.

career advice
An example of a “getting over a man” outfit by yours truly

So, in matters of career and the heart, which type of ghosting hurts the most? In the past month, I’ve been ghosted both in the relationship department and by a “dream” job that I interviewed for. I know the “getting over someone” drill, it’s a tried and true routine that I’ve perfected since I was about 16. I give myself about 24 hours (sometimes, when it’s serious, 48 hours are needed). In those 24 hours; I cry, I yell, scream, I watch Breakfast at Tiffany’s and eat ice cream. I don’t know why I do this, but I do, it’s my thing. Back off. After I give myself “x” amount of time to feel sorry for myself, I get back to the grind. I go to the gym, I put a ton of effort into my appearance, and I’m back prowlin’ on King Street (for those unfamiliar with Charleston, that’s our “main drag”, if you will – most bars and restaurants are located here). However, being rejected from a job is unchartered territory for me.

I allow myself only “x” amount of time to feel sorry for myself, then, it’s back to business.

Okay, so, here’s the 411. About 3 weeks ago now, I interviewed for a “dream job”. Hint: this company rhymes with Smickelodeon, and I interviewed to be a social media manager. YEAH. It was huge. I was shaking when I answered the phone to interview. I could tell that the interviewer knew that I was nervous as well and, after the interview, I did not have that “oh hell yeah, I nailed that” feeling. Which, to be honest, is a bit of a new feeling for me – I know this sounds conceited but just keep reading because I’m about to get a big ass piece of humble pie.

I know I have been rejected because I follow this company on LinkedIn. About a week or two later, I saw the job posted again, which means to me that they didn’t like this pool of candidates and are trying one more time. Further, I haven’t heard anything back from them despite my desperate attempts to follow up. This, to me, is the equivalent of losing “top friend” status on Snapchat, receiving less communication from someone, and maybe seeing said person post a picture with a replacement you. Which SUCKS no matter how long you’ve been seeing each other or how much you actually liked them.

Now, in this case, my “cry and watch Audrey Hepburn movies” method of getting over it didn’t work. I couldn’t just slap on some lipstick and a little outfit and move on. The only way you can really move on from this type of ghosting is to:

  1. Acknowledge your weaknesses. Why do you think that you weren’t right for the job? Which questions could you have answered better? What did you say that could have possibly raised a red flag to the interviewer?
  2. Change your course. Was I considering breaking my lease and moving to NYC? You bet. However, life sometimes sucks and you can’t always get your way. The only way to remedy this is to look forward to something else, pick yourself up and carry on.
  3. Hit the pavement, again. Just like going out and getting over someone, start making it rain with resumes! Write some *bomb* cover letters and put yourself back out there.

Slap some lipstick on that resume and hit the pavement!

Getting rejected from a job, SUCKS. But that doesn’t mean that you’re unemployable or should give up on your dream. Keep grindin’, keep working hard, and earn it. If you really want it, get out there and fight for it. *Insert fist emoji*


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